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My transition VS another transsexual woman's

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I know that most transgender women are dealing with insecurities.  It’s bad enough to be born in a body that is opposite to one’s mind, and even made worst when after all of your efforts to change it, you’re still not getting the results that you desire.

My articles are mostly about giving tips in regards to transgender dating.  However, how are we going to find true love if we don’t love ourselves first?

I am a transgender woman and the situations that I’m going to share with you are from my experience. Please take this guide with a grain of salt.

She has a curvier body than mine

I know that some transwomen are naturally gifted with an amazing waist-to-hip ratio without even trying.  Mind you, I’ve been taking HRT medications since I was 16 and I still haven’t developed curvy hips and butt.  Please know that estrogen is there to help you to a certain extent only.   There are things that are totally out of its control in terms of YOUR desired results.  The way I deal with it is by knowing the right type of clothing that flatters my body.  Sure, it would be nice to have a curvy body when naked but I won’t consider having it by undergoing silicone injections or butt implants.

The first one is very risky in terms of health and the latter just looks totally fake.

The best option that you can look into is the Brazilian butt lift. However, it’s not a viable option if you don’t have enough fat to transfer.  Suffice to say, with whatever shape that you have, you SHOULDN’T dwell on what you dislike too much if you are powerless to change it.

What you can do, is find someone to look up to who has the similar shape as you do and walk with confidence.  I have big breasts but I’m not gifted on the lower part of my body but whenever I look at Kate Upton who has a similar shape as I do, I feel as though we all have a place in this world.  Besides, not all guys want a Coca-Cola type of body especially for the price of rotten skin years after.

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Her voice sounds more feminine

This one is an insecurity of a friend of mine. She’s absolutely gorgeous but her voice is quite manly.  She masks her speaking voice with a falsetto because she wasn’t able to modulate her voice early on.  Please know that hormones don’t help with the pitch of one’s voice.  It’s something that’s practiced and can be learned.  There are various tutorials on YouTube.  Look up “Vocal Feminization”.

She has more admirers than I do

In some transgender dating websites, there’s a column that shows the most popular transwomen members.  Their visibility is determined by the number of likes that their photos get.  To be honest, this is not one of my insecurities but I’m going to speak for someone who I know feels this way.

If you come to notice, these profiles are filled with risqué photos that are a hair away from p*rn.  Sure, they get the attention that they want but at the end of the day, do you think that a man who is seriously looking for love in a transgender dating website will pick this type of girl?

It’s not about winning in a transgender dating site, its about finding LOVE.  Furthermore, for that to happen, you should find it within yourself first.

I have a lot more to share but we’ll save that for later.




Posted in Love and Relationships
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About the author

Amanda Valentine Dela Cruz
Just a random trans woman playing with makeup and skincare. Loves bacon and the operating table. I'm also the author of the dating guide book Dating Transgender Women for Gentlemen. Know more ->

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