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Is Your Online Relationship Fake Love

Amanda Valentine Dela Cruz

Looking for love online sounds exciting. But if you’re not careful, you could end up getting your heart broken. Some, even have it so bad that it can affect their savings account.

1. They don’t respect your time

Have you ever met someone online and it seems like you’re the only one adjusting? Do they make statements like they can’t talk to you at a certain time because of their work, activities, hobbies, etc?

Did they ever consider your time? Did they ever try to make a compromise when it comes to the scheduling of your conversations or dates?

a guy's watch

If your answer is no, you’re probably dealing with someone who’s faking their love.

You see, if someone likes you, they will care about you. They will understand that it’s not only their time that should be respected. A real relationship is a 2-way street. Don’t make excuses for them.

2. You’re the only one who compromises

Time is one of the issues that are highly affected in the talks of compromise. Now, there are other tell-tale signs that you’re the only one who’s compromising. These may be in the form of:

  • Are you the only one who’s being called out for “bad behavior”?
  • Is it only you who’s apologizing when things get rough?
  • Do they always pick the movie, type of date, food, etc.?
  • Are they influencing your decisions in life all the time?
  • Does it feel like you’re always doing what they tell you to do?
  • Don’t they respond in a positive way after you’ve shared with them the negative emotions that you have because of what they’ve done? The list could go on forever, the bottom line is, are you the only one compromising?

3. They’re flaky

A person who’s in love with you will take their words and promises seriously. If you often find yourself wondering what happened after they consistently fail you, it’s time to assess your relationship to the next level.

a sad woman

Being late once or twice is okay. Forgetting promises is also forgivable, but to a certain extent only. If they’re exhibiting this behavior routinely, it’s time to rethink if you’re on the right path.

If a person doesn’t take you seriously, they’re probably just stringing you along. They’re so comfortable to the point that it’s okay with them to religiously disappoint you. And they’re not scared of the repercussions.

4. You caught them chatting with other people on dating sites

Some people are very forgiving to the point that they will let infidelity be something that equates to forgetting to water the plants. While others are very clear with their boundaries and consider cheating to be a dealbreaker.

Now, if you really love this person, you may compromise your virtues. But if it gets to the point of being a reoccurring scene in your relationship, the options should be to be leaving the dickhead or continuing to take the beating.

Some might say that chatting is harmless. But if you are with the right mindset, you’ll know that it’s the beginning of an affair. No matter how short-lived it may be, it’s still an affair.

So now that you have the cards, you’re the only one who knows which decision to make. Hopefully, it’ll be a good one.

You see, if a person’s truly in love with you, it’ll feel like they’re wearing rose-colored glasses. You’ll only be the person in their heads and they won’t have the extra time to be getting to know other people. They’d rather use that time to spend it with you!

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5. They make you do a lot of intimate stuff

This is more applicable to transgender women than men. You see, many inappropriate individuals infiltrate dating websites. Many of them only fetishize trans women. Sadly, this is the norm even if it shouldn’t be.

If you find that in the relationship, they’re making you do a lot of kinky stuff, you’re probably just a fantasy fulfiller to them and that it’s fake love. Someone who will consider how you feel about these things is the one that you should be dating.

a mask

The last straw in this type of setup is if they guilt-trip you into doing things. Drop them the moment they utter these words:

  1. Please stop taking hormones if you really want to make me happy. I want you to be versatile.
  2. I can’t get an erection unless you inflict pain on me. If you want this to work, you have to do this for me.
  3. I’m sorry, if you become a post-op, I don’t think I’ll be attracted to you anymore.

6. They barely ask about your welfare

Is it of a rarity for them to know how you’re doing? Do you have deep and meaningful conversations with him? No, it does not count whether they ask if you’ve eaten your dinner or not.

Do they ask about your mood, situation, work, family, health, etc. regularly? If they don’t, they probably don’t care about you or you openly tell them all about you.

Sometimes, silence gets boring and the way most of us break the ice is to talk about ourselves. But when getting to know another person, it’s very important to shut your mouth once in a while and observe the energy that they want to give you.

7. They’re disinterested in the talk about their and your circle

If your relationship is in its early stages, this won’t apply. But if you’ve been with this person for months and they haven’t even asked about any single person from your circle or they’re not open to talking about theirs, they’re probably disinterested in a real future with you.

4 happy friends

A person who’s serious about you will want to know what they’re getting themselves into. They will also be open to sharing their life with you. They’re also probably hiding a lot of things from you and they’re living a double life.

Yes, some people will not engage in a conversation like this because guess what, they’re already married or in a relationship! They’re too afraid to let you get too close to avoid the inevitable explosion from the truth.

8. Always threatening to break up

Someone who’s manipulative will always threaten to break up when things get rocky. While others, are doing so because it’s their real feelings towards you. That if you do the thing that they don’t want you to do, they will not have an ounce of remorse or sadness when they free themselves from you.

This is one of the most telling signs that the relationship is just FAKE LOVE! It shouldn’t be easy for anyone to break up if they truly love their partner.

9. No talks of meeting up

If you’ve been talking to them for months and they’ve not mentioned meeting up yet, delete them from your life. Don’t invest in someone who doesn’t have the same goals as you do.

a couple texting each other

You see, a dating site’s premise is to connect people from online, to offline. If they’re not willing to take that next step, then why the hell are you keeping communication lines open with them?

10. No target date

Now, this is more applicable to trans women. If they do say that they want to meet you, that’s fine. However, to know if they’re true to their word, you must at the very least, get a ballpark figure of a target date on when they could meet you up.

Posted in Love and Relationships
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About the author

Amanda Valentine Dela Cruz
Amanda Valentine is a transgender woman who has written about trans topics for over 10 years for My Transgender Date. She is an author who made it on Amazon’s best-seller list by writing 5 books on trans women’s relationships. Her book “Dating Transgender Women for Gentlemen” peaked at #3 in the Transgender Studies category on Amazon. She started writing at the age of 10 and won a poetry contest in 4th grade which convinced her to pursue a career in literature. Her personal experiences as a transgender woman give her a unique perspective on trans topics.

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